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Showing posts from 2008

i never thought i did

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Wishes (or Hopes) That Not Come True

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I have a number of wishes..or hopes..or maybe sueños que sean realidad.. pero, not all come true.. this is a very usual things to happen, sometimes you can put aside,but sometimes when you want it sooo bad, for soooo long.. you just can't help but to have a bit resentment towards it. well..not all the things i'm craving for in this life, i get it easily. like this article that i've read, "i will achieve sth well, but in other important thing, i just unlucky".and now i kinda fell into believing this since, this is what happening right now. i have this one th, i've done with 'resentment' thingy, yet for other th it's just, doesn't seem to 'cool' down.. and, when it's being stir up..i just pour everything out, and the victim is my mum-though it's not like she knows bout it. i believe, only kak da knows and sev other friends who asked me bout my ym status-thankfully they didn't know what the issue is. when i rethink

Learn fr Yesterday..Appreciate Today

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this is an extract fr Suna's blog.. "Hurm…dah hampir 3 minggu kat umah. Saper tak best dok goyang kaki je dengan family ter’chenta’…tapi kalo dah lam2 sgt, buhsan pun mula bertandang. Sekarang rasa mcm tak sabar2 nak keja. Setiap interview yg dihadiri mesti dengan harapan yang berbunga2… Tapi, bila dah hampir dengan dunia kerjaya, mcm2 cerita plak yg aku dgr. Kawan2 yang dah mula kerja semua kata tak best…huhu…semua nak balik pd zaman belajar. Agaknya, mcm tu jugak kah aku nanti?? Manusia mmg tak pernah puas dgn apa yg ada. Aku penah tanyer ayah, dlm byk2 zaman yg dia lalui, zmn mana plg best?….jwapan dia best bg aku….ayah kata, semua zaman yg dia lalui adalah best dan bermakna hargailah apa yg ada pd kita sebelum kita kehilangannya….be happy wit h ur life ;p ( July 5th 2007) " That is very like me..always like my past live, and never like to live in present day. But then, when today is gone, I'll be missing today,later. I have thought bout this..while I'm

Beginning Today~

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Beginning today I will no longer worry about yesterday. It is in the past and the past will ne ver change. Only I can change by choosing to do so. Beginning today I will no longer worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will always be there, waiting for me to make the most of it. But I cannot make the most of tomorrow without first making the most of today. Beginning today I will look in the mirror and I wi ll see a person worthy of my respect and admiration. This capable person looking back at me is someone I enjoy spending time with and someone I would like to get to know better. Beginning today I will cherish each moment of my life. I value the gift bestowed upon me in this world and I will unselfishly share this gift with others. Beginning today I will take a moment to step off the beaten path and to revel in the mysteries I encounter. I will face challenges with courage and determination. I will overcome what barriers there may be which hinder my quest for growth and

Mana peraturan? Mana keazaman?

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Ya Allah sakit kepala n mcm tak sihat je. ni yang tak besh nie. satgi aku kena g jps ampang. aku mcm mmg besh nak g,hari tuh la.. then hari ni i just dont feel like going at all. tak besh nie. tp nak buat cane..kalu kena, g gak aku. penat tau bw laptop mai opis. quite heavy, then nak install media manager pon tak leh. cis.kurang kegunaan tol. aku kalu takat malas rsnya berguna lagi, tp kalu kesihatan kurang nie yg menyampah ni. lagi satu kalu mengantuk.. aku tido cukup je smlm..pagi nie pon jaga dr time subuh sampai terpaksa berpura2 tido balik sbb rs mcm awal sgt bgn.. td takmo tido, skang ngantuk. mengada la tuh. aku nk siap keje.. jgn la ada rs tak sihat ke apa plak. aku mmg nak wat keje nie. please.. * i am wearing the same outfit as in the picture today but those are taken on my b-day and today i have shorter n messier hair with less hepiness n semangat

birthdate~

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- September 4 - You are very clever and knowledgeable. You are very calm and cool in social situations. You are kind and sympathetic to people, although you like to choose your friends carefully. Positive Traits: organized, perceptive, disciplined, balanced, just Negative Traits: obsessive, compulsive, tyrannical, demanding, non-communicative

my straight hair-bob look (love it much2)

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1st trial dptkan ramut pendek yg tak payah ikat. sukeeeee sgt. especially when it still straight & sleek. nope.. i didn't get my hair doing the rebonding thingy.. it's enough having it straight once in a while..  **dlm toilet jj wangsa maju

WORK: $ or great Environment

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i got this dream last nite-'bout my work. My boss wants me to stay for 3 months @year at least, i suddenly get panic bout the what if i got another offer which result is due this month,another 2 weeks. i don't want to think of anything related to the dream-saying the opposite is true bla bla..(the the opposite would be the boss doesn't want me to stay? hmmm) then this morning, kak ita and kak farah talk about this one company i didn't know about but about the environment, bodek mbodek blabla...how you can't hv both money and great environment.. truthfully, i love money. i love working and having more money. yet, i don't think hydec's offer is too low. and the environment is great. i don't know bout the gov thing. usually they all ok,right? but i need to know..will i'll be having such this place to work at? casual dress, not too strict with the time at the office, only with work..my sv, my colleague...everything and i even consider not to go

'helping man'

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Siew Lian, Kak Farah, Cef, Kak Zura, En Mat, Kak Lela, Kak Roza, Kak Shima, Me, Kak Suzi Pak Ya, Abg Fasli & Abg Man the picture above is taken during Hydec open house in Pan Pacific hotel. sadly, not every1 in the picture.. anyway, a day before the open house, I got a meeting along with my 2 bosses n my sv, sorta, my boss too, so 4 of us went to kuantan for this meeting and as we all know what the outcome would be, we just accept it, only on my shoulder it seems more load..y'know with all the pending job.huhu..tula org ckp, do not procrastinate. but then, it's not like i played around. it seems like those are the work with less priority..but then..no work is  too  less priority to be dragged for that long..oops! kak suzi amik gambar time tgh amik food comey kak ira..kan? with kak rina..  and then..like help fall from heaven.. the xpswmm expert is coming to help us, mainly me on my model. he's from portland ok..not within malaysia. yeay.. so, ev

(not-so) hAPPY dEEPAVALi

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hari ni pesta cahaya..aku lak keje the whole week including today. memula tak la tensen sgt, mmg keje nie, mcm nie..tp bila 3 hari berturut2 hari cuti aku kene..aku dah rs menyampah at the 3rd day. nak tmbah tak besh lagi, bila jaja ada kat umah aku..waaa..rosak aktiviti weekend yg di rancang sejak last week...dem aku gak yg tak siapkan..lebey kepada aku buat tp aku tatau nak present pe kat bos. kena lak meeting sok, lagi la parah. aku bukan tak buat keje..tp menda model nie 1st time, aku pon tatau nak buat trus dpt result besh je.. kalu aku terer mcm tuh, aku mmg bahagia la..isk2..tak besh la jd org yg kena berusaha byk nie, tp tak capai level mcm org yg berusaha besa2.. kalu sal study aku, mmg tahap biasa je..sbb bukan jenis study.haha.. tp kalau yg nie, hurm..aku pon tatau. aku nak balik n g beraya la kat kl. bos aku tak masuk nak check lak..disyaki dia balas dendam bcoz i made him wait this morning. isk2..cuti2 pon, dtg keje mcm dh penuh hemah..nie kena dtg awal laks..mcm

ENGINEER

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1st job : Engineer @ opis what's with engineering.. I am an engineer. I am working as a civil engineer. I graduated with Bachelor of engineering with honour, in Civil. ...but although in the world, at least Malaysia i am seen as one..am i really one, or at least do i feel like one? THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN THE QUESTION i always hate it yet like it. this is my biggest regret, yet the most thing i am proud of happened to me. yet it always makes me think,why i am here..why i am this. Kak Da always said i am lucky to be an engineer after i studied engineering which, some of her friends,some people don't get to do that. Kak Da also said, ALLAH S.W.T always know what i can do, thus ALLAH S.W.T actually gave me what i can do..and this is the best for me. Again, Kak Da always said, if i don't want to be an engineer? what would i be?? I always believe I am lucky to be an engineer-consider my past and my study.also, lucky I got into UTP to study for engineering

TOO BAD, experience costs you your AGE

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in life, you never know what or how something is unless you learn bout it, or watch it being done or maybe the best of all is to experience it yourself. too bad, to gain experience, there is a loooong windy road you have to go through. I'm not looking for shortcut, though sometimes you have to admit.. time is everything..you need something to speed it up the process-thus a little cut here and there would help a lot.. that's why there's history-for people to learn what to do and what not- based on someone else's doing..for you to learn not to do the same thing the other did that can be classified as 'mistakes' that's why there's teacher.. for you to learn from them..they learned it before..they experienced it before, they can guide you to be..and to have what they have now-knowledge of course.. that's why there's life.. for you to see the others doing and ask what they're doing so that you can judge and you may learn what needed to be lea

almost November~

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hurm.. it is almost november, tomorrow i'll be having a meeting with en izihan, so i guess i have to prep what to show him.. well..one of the simulation is still running from yesterday's evening. take quite some time since i lowered down the time step..   l ast saturday, i went to masjid india with jaja.. well i have some madness in buying kain ela for baju kurung and somewhat feels that my collection of baju kurung are all quite buruk and oversized. moreover, since last raya shopping at masjid india..i think i want to make a lot of baju kurung of different fashion..esp the one that can show of my petite figure.. haha.. tradisional one just so lame..i think i should act more like a women than a girl..besides, if i were to get jkr job, i really need big collection of bj kurung. y'know..gov. but i like it.   speaking of interview and job.. i really think i want to stay for some time in hydec. as much as i like changing job right now especially to government.. i do thi

She's so LUCKY

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Luck..Luck..Luck If i were to look back to my past, i don't think my life can be considered as lucky at all. But from where i am now..i think I am blessed. Or maybe, because I believe. I'm not a good student,just average. But i am getting better and accepted into a university to do an engineering degree-which never crossed my mind, i would do an engineering degree or even could be an engineer someday. There's always up and down in my life. What other people see from far, are only the worst and sometimes the best, nothing in between. But i guess, the most important thing for me is to believe that, Allah helps me a lot along the way in getting this life i am living right now. As much as i am sorry for myself for not having better job than i have right now-I'm already over that-, I still believe Allah knows what's best for me..   And if what i have now is considered as LUCK, i just accept it-knowing it is YOU all along. Besides, i need that as i don

bosankah idop ini?

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hobi bila buntu di opis..huhu Last nite, Yati ajak g beli nasi lemak for dinner. tp yg m'ajak tuh demam- bertambah teruk so only Jannah n me je la yg hunting for nasi lemak kat kolej tar tu..tp makan kat umah sama2. aku..tambah teh ais satu. hehehe..ujan2 sempat lagi minum teh ais. tv hari selasa yg selalunya-dulunya best. rs mcm takde pe skang. nama je ada astro..kalu time bosan tuh..mmg lagi tinggi bosan dr tahap kecipanan. nk bukak cd pon takde mood..jd aku bukak buku, men crossword..tp tak cukup kaver bosan..tulis journal.haha.. byk sgt idea nk tulis esp lepas cuti 2 minggu kat kedah-sal raya, jln2, nephew, kucing2, interview, aloq star, berkelah...byknya menda best..kan2? tp aleh2..tersentuh ceta sensitp..habis 4-5pages sal menda yg ngarut. itulah aku..better simpan buku tepi n tido. dah la lepas lipstick jungle..nk layan desperate housewives-walupon dh tgk,kena beralah sbb astro buat hal-ujan, services currently not available la,apa lg..isk2.mmg la patut mendengar

that.serious.look

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tempat 'aman' saya.. (sila cari teh o ais..hehe) she said before. i heard before. but when she said again it's making me questioning myself and my life with whatever i believe.. it strikes me..i might have done something wrong towards her, or maybe it's just her 'kind' action..but her critics bout my-looks-cause-me-my-love-life..is something really not acceptable - she mentioned it not just once or tw ice,y'know. in addition, her example of lame life of her friends without relationship and that i should be pasrah sepasrah yang mungkin so that the one person for me will show himself,just like how she get to meet abg basri..how lame could it be, my life in her eyes? arrrr..my love life..i hate it the way it is and i hate that i dont even know what to do with it..so what the heck. i think i should ignore this too!

Kerja..wat else

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ah..this picture. see, i'm wearing henna on my left hand. I'm in kelisa-now abah's, front of petl.. nice color of henna,rite? i took 2 weeks leave from work including raya cuti. or else, couldn't afford to cuti that long. the main reason i took such long leave is due to an interview with spa. at first i don't really want to go-and to the very last minute, i still hate to go but, i think i want this job since i saw the allowance and after some talks with abah day before raya - besides the fact that i hate not getting the job while i attended the interview and also because mama n abah had spend some money to get me to the interview - I want this. Not that i hate my current job. it's the total opposite. kerja2...even if it seems easy than studying - and more boring too.. it is like everything else..hard at the first, not sure for how long. until getting the momentum.. kerja..kerja..wat else? nak idop kan. mcm abah kata, 'kalu tak kerja nak makan apa

Issue: Girl in 20s

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i'm 24. i have to admit-i never have a bf. it is an issue for me for the past years but i have to make it clear, right now, this is not exactly my goal or ambition or whatever. i just started working and seriously, i love my life right now-having no (or less) responsibility, why should i jump into relationship thing? i hate having to stress or explain bout this-it's like me stressing this thing, saying it over and over again to make myself believe it but, sesapa pun kalu kena attack, mesti akan lawan balik. moreover to this kinda thing..tak laku tu, not something that is acceptable. huhu~lame! lately, sb entered my life. sb who is my friend, but i think trying to upgrade his 'status' into my special friend. (mind, there's a word "think" there). usually i will discuss my deepest secret with my younger sister, so i am trying to do the same with this matter, but right now it seems like everyone think their issue is more important than others..so

~Ésta Es Mi Vida~

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all this while i've been writing in 360. to me blogging is a way to express my real feeling about some situation so, i am afraid it could harm certain parties! well if i think it should not be read, then i can just make it not readable,rite? hehe.. this blog would be bout me, me and me..but maybe sometimes, bout my families and my close friends,colleagues, acquaintances.. Well it could be anyone i happened to met at the streets too- if they are intresting enuf..so, jom buat ceta ek!